This old man clearly has something in him. Maybe he should get his pee patented. Imagine how much everyone will save on fuel if everyone could run their cars on piss. Genius! Simply genius!
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1. Regular naps prevent old age... especially if you take them while
driving.
2. Having one child makes you a parent; having two makes you a referee.
3. Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and
the other is the husband!
4. They said we should all pay our tax with a smile. I tried - but they
wanted cash.
5. A child's greatest period of growth is the month after you've
purchased new school uniforms.
6. Don't feel bad. A lot of people have no talent.
7. Don't marry the person you want to live with, marry the one you
cannot live without... but whatever you do, you'll regret it later.
8. You can't buy love . . but you pay heavily for it.
9. Forgiveness is giving up my right to hate you for hurting me.
10. Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.
11. Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get
tired.
12. My girlfriend and I always compromise. I admit I'm wrong and she
agrees with me.
13. Those who can't laugh at themselves leave the job to others.
14. Ladies first. Pretty ladies sooner.
15. It doesn't matter how often a married man changes his job, he
still ends up with the same boss.
16. They call our language the mother tongue because the father seldom
gets to speak.
17. Saving is the best thing. Especially when your parents have done it
for you.
18. Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools talk
because they have to say something.
19. Real friends are the ones who survive transitions between address
book.
